A Friend (Part 3)

Just like Jesus, a friend loves unconditionally!

In Part 1, I wrote about the trait of unselfishness; in order to be a friend I must be willing to give myself to others. In Part 2, I wrote about the trait of honesty; in order to be a friend I must be honest with others about myself. In this third and final part, I want to share what I believe is the third trait one must have to be a friend; I must be willing to love. The word love can be and is interpreted to mean so many things to every one of us, but if we look in scripture we find one supreme example of love: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”1 In order to understand the depth of God’s love, we must acknowledge that He gave what no ordinary person would do; He gave His one and only Son. God gave…period! Love is really about my willingness to give. The mistake we humans make is in our effort to get something from others. We confuse getting with love in the belief that it will bring satisfaction, but getting only leads to an emptiness which must be further fueled by additional getting. Sadly, so many relationships have become stranded (much like a beached whale in the hot sun) because one or both people never truly understood the value of genuinely loving someone other than themselves. A friend never seeks to have the advantage in a relationship. A friend never has an attitude of getting something from a friend. That’s not what I would call friendship; words like self-serving, manipulator and deceptive readily come to my mind. A friend loves in such a way that they are willing to give to another; it’s a conscious choice they’ve made. Love really is about giving! When you learn to give love, you realize it’s not about someone else living up to your expectations, because the truth is they cannot. In this life, every one of us have said things, done things that we regret (I know I have), but I’ve come to appreciate God’s love for me in spite of my personal failures. Discovering this truth has helped me to see the need to love others not on the basis of what they do, but on the basis of who they are. This change has freed me to love in a way I didn’t know was possible. I remember having a discussion with a single mom about love and she contrasted the love for her child to the love for her ex-husband. I understood her to say that her husband failed in some way that prevented her from continuing with the marriage. I asked if her child ever disappointed her in some way that was unforgivable and she could not fathom an instance when no matter what the child did, there would ever come a time she could not love her child. Her answer made me wonder how the mother of a murderer, thief, or liar would respond. Some might say that it’s a maternal thing with women that enables them to love someone they’ve birthed into the world, but then, not all women exhibit that trait. Some mothers abuse their children, some even kill them. A mother must choose to love her child, she must choose to give love, no matter how much disappointment a child may cause in her life. Can it be any different to choose to love someone I didn’t give birth to? Adoptive parents are capable of loving a child which is not biologically related. How? They choose to love. They choose to give their life to another. How does a husband love an unfaithful wife? How does a wife love an abusive husband? How do I love a friend who betrays me? These are not questions which can be answered with a fortune cookie. There are hard questions which challenge the longevity of relationships and friendships. If I am going to be a friend, I must understand and accept that the durability of my love for others will face adversity, disappointment, and possibly regret. In the end, it will come down to what I choose. Is this person worthy of my love? Am I willing to continue this friendship? Please understand that I am not advocating anyone be a doormat. On the contrary, we all understand the need for boundaries. There are parameters which each of us accepts as part of any friendship; if they are not explicit, they should be implicitly understood. Friendship requires an open channel of honest communication between two people. Friendship requires a level of trust that demonstrates dependability and loyalty. Others may desert you, but not your friend. A friend loves. They’ve made the choice to love you, just as God made the choice to love us; He gave…. Love gives! MTJ

A Note of Thanks: I would just like to say Thank you, to each of you who visit My Thought-filled Journey. Taking time out of your busy schedule to read a post on this blog encourages me. Many of those who visit, will from time to time leave a comment, but it really doesn't matter whether a comment is left. What matters, is that you came here. I hope you find encouragement and inspiration in these words. Please know I will pray with you regarding any circumstance you may be facing. Feel free to write me to say "Hello", request prayer, or share what God is doing in your life. I have not said it enough, but thank you for the light of Christ in your life which illuminates the way for us all.

Footnote:

1. John 3:16, NIV

References:

1. Strong's Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, By James B. Strong, S.T.D, LL.D., Riverside Book and Bible House, Iowa Falls, Iowa 50126
2. Unger's Bible Dictionary, By Merrill F. Unger, Moody Press, Chicago
3. The NIV Study Bible, Edited by Kenneth Barker, Donald Burdick, John Stek, Walter Wessel and Ronald Youngblood, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530, USA

Note: This post is linked to Spiritual Sundays (hosted by Charlotte).

I'm Waiting

I'm Waiting on The Lord

I’m waiting… For a word from you. Just a hint will do, because...     I'm waiting. There is no hurry, no worries, no rush, because...     I'm waiting. When you're ready, you will let me know, because..     You know I'm waiting. You said, “Wait...”, and so I do. You said, “I would run and not get weary...”     I'm not weary Lord. If I ask, will You not answer me?     I know You will! So You see, that's why...     I'm waiting. Who are they that wait? Those who need not ask the question..     “How long Lord, How long?” They who wait are patient. I may not see the road ahead...     but I know You've made a way,     when there was no way! That is why...     I'm waiting. It may be an unpaved road, but it's my road...     bulldozed by Your word. It may be a steep climb, but I have the faith...     to ascend this height! It may be the road less traveled by others...     but I know it leads to You. I may get stuck in the mud some time, but     I will trust You to guide me through. That is why...     I'm waiting. While some may flee at the first sign of terror,     I'll stand firm and wait. When the doctor says, “There is no cure”,     I'm waiting for Your prognosis. When the lawyer says, “You have no case”,     I'll wait for Your vindication. When the job says, “You've been laid off!”,     Send me to that ripe harvest field. When the bank says, “We're seizing your home!”,     I have a place prepared by You. You see Lord, I've learned that it's best...     to wait on You. Some have asked me:     “Why do you wait for someone you cannot see?”     I say,     “Eyes have not seen the goodness of the Lord”. Others may ask:     “Why wait for words that are not spoken?”     I say,     “Ears cannot hear the words, ‘Peace be still’” Still others ask:     “Why wait when the table is bare?”     I say,     “Who will taste and see that the Lord is good?” Others may mock, but I will glory in the Lord! That is why...     I'm waiting. Poem by MTJ

Note: This post is linked to Spiritual Sundays (hosted by Charlotte).

Look at Me Lord

Look at me Lord as I pray
(Image courtesy of http://gr8trimpact.com)

Look at me Lord; I’m down on my knees. I’ve been here before…     Lord, hear my plea. Times are hard, but I’ll never give up Touch me Lord… please fill my cup. Teach me the words…     of the Apostle’s Creed Remind me again, it’s You that I need The light in me…     must shine so bright. Illumine me Lord…     You are The Light. I once was blind, but now I see. Are not mere words…     to those set free. Free to walk, in the newness of life. You transformed me...     from darkness to light. I’ve risen with Christ…     who rose from the dead. The church is the body…     He is the head. So look at me Lord, pour out your grace. Purge me with hyssop...     prostrate on my face. Lying before…     Your Heavenly Throne. My soul thirsts for You, cause heaven's my home. I want to go home, but I need to stay. There’s work to be done...     I’m the Potter’s clay. So look at me Lord…     it's here where I stand. I love you Lord Jesus…     my life’s in Your hands. Yes, look at me Lord…     You’ve blessed my life. I’m ready to labor…     the harvest is ripe. Poem by MTJ

Note: This post is linked to Spiritual Sundays (hosted by Charlotte).

God is on my side!

Happy Mother's Day!
Note: Let me first say thanks to all who read this blog, many of whom are mothers. This Sunday is the day set aside to acknowledge and honor the many women who give birth, nurture, and raise children. There is no way a child can repay the sacrifices a mother makes, the love she freely gives, and the grace she extends. Yet, I do believe that a mother can be honored by the life I choose to live. In living for Christ, I offer to God and my mother the greatest honor I can give; my life. To mothers everywhere I say:

Happy Mother's Day!

---

	This I know: God is on my side!”
	"God causes everything to work together for the good"

I’ve read them before as I sure many others have, but somehow the words echo in my thoughts. Perhaps it is the Holy Spirit providing me with gentle reminders that God hasn’t given up on me. I think most of us experience some measure of defeat in our life, moments of discouragement, a loss, a hurt, some degree of sadness.

I was thinking how God feels at times, when I didn’t trust Him, when I gave up on Him, or when I didn’t believe His word. The bible speaks of God repenting that He made humanity. How painful it must have been for the God who loves us so much that He gave His only Son, to regret His creative acts..

Yet God moves beyond His regrets and extends grace to all that would receive it.

“…when I call to you for help. This I know: God is on my side!”¹

How do you know God is on your side?

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”²

I can’t think of any words more affirming and assuring. Words proclaiming that The Living God cares about my life, every facet, aspect, and moment that He invests His love and life in me:

1. The Holy Spirit is the investment which declares that we have been sealed: “When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit…”³
2. Jesus Christ is the redeemer who answers the demand of punishment for our sins: “…we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; and He Himself is the propitiation for our sins…”⁴
3. God the Father is the adopter who defines us as His own children: “…so that He might redeem those who were under the Law, that we might receive the adoption as sons.”⁵

I can doubt, but God doesn’t. He is certain about my position in Christ; for Him, I am secured. His word provides me with assurances, but I must trust and believe Him.

“...God is on my side!”

“This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.”⁶

Note: This post is linked to Spiritual Sundays (hosted by Charlotte and Ginger).

Footnotes:

1. Psalm 56:9, NLTB
2. Romans 8:28, NLTB
3. Ephesians 1:13, NIV
4. 1 John 2:1-2, NASB
5. Galatians 5:5, NASB
6. 1 John 5:14, NASB

References:

1. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6
2. The Message Bible, by Eugene H. Peterson, NavPress Publishing Group, Colorado Springs, CO, ISBN-13: 978-1600060250
3. The NIV Study Bible, Edited by Kenneth Barker, Donald Burdick, John Stek, Walter Wessel and Ronald Youngblood, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530, USA
4. The New Living Translation Bible, by Tyndale Charitable Trust, Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois, ISBN-13: 978-0842384896

Take a Number

I’ve faced many instances in my life where I’ve failed and I’ve come to recognize one of four situations:

1. Sometimes my desire lacked commitment.
2. Sometimes my effort lacked discipline.
3. Sometimes my skill set was inadequate.
4. Sometimes God just said, “Take a number”

As you can imagine, I’ve also experienced my own share of disappointment and frustration when it comes to failure. God’s word speaks truth to me when I examine my thoughts and experiences regarding failure. When Jesus was asked which commandment is the greatest, he gave only two:

“But when the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered themselves together. One of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, ‘Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?’ And He said to him, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.”¹

It’s that second one that speaks to me about my attitude and failure; Love my neighbor as I love myself. What I realize is that I love me and I will go to great lengths to prove my love for me. That may mean treating myself to some chocolate cake, buying shoes or clothes, the car I want, or traveling to a place I’ve wanted to go. I do these things because I love me.

So I may fail as a result of those first three situations, but it’s OK because I still love me. I may be disappointed and even frustrated, but I’m not angry at me because, I love me. But situation number four has always resulted in me being angry at God for denying me and I see now that I failed in the first commandment to love God to the same degree that I love myself. I don’t question my love for me, and I don’t question God’s love for me; I know both are true. However, I have to question my love for God because when I’ve failed because He says, “Take a number”, I don’t love Him the way I love myself; I’m being selfish towards God.

I don’t know why God sometimes says “Take a number”, but He’s God and that’s His prerogative as The Sovereign Lord; His ways and thoughts are not mine. I no longer want to be selfish towards God (or anyone else for that matter). At a minimum, I want to love God as I love myself. I also realize that when God says, “Take a number”, it doesn’t mean never.

I believe this because of something I read in scripture:

“Jesus got up and went away from there to the region of Tyre. And when He had entered a house, He wanted no one to know of it; yet He could not escape notice. But after hearing of Him, a woman whose little daughter had an unclean spirit immediately came and fell at His feet. Now the woman was a Gentile, of the Syrophoenician race. And she kept asking Him to cast the demon out of her daughter. And He was saying to her, ‘Let the children be satisfied first, for it is not good to take the children's bread and throw it to the dogs.’ But she answered and said to Him, ‘Yes, Lord, but even the dogs under the table feed on the children's crumbs.’ And He said to her, ‘Because of this answer go; the demon has gone out of your daughter.’ And going back to her home, she found the child lying on the bed, the demon having left."²

This scripture reminds me that just before the sun rises; it may seem to be the darkest time of my life. In Mark, the bible speaks of a woman who came to Jesus asking Him to heal her daughter who was possessed by an unclean spirit. Because the woman was a Syrophoenician (a Gentile), Jesus essentially told her to take a number. Now if you’ve ever had to wait in line for someone to call your number, imagine what it would feel like if the ticket you were holding had no number.

Would you wait as long as it took for an answer, or would you just become frustrated and give up?

Giving up isn’t just my not trusting God, it’s my not loving God as well.

But this woman demonstrates that she not only believes in Jesus, she loves Him to the degree that she’ll accept whatever attention He gives her because:

1. She doesn’t need an answer packaged in a beautiful wrapping paper and ribbon.
2. She doesn't demand to be given a seat at the dinner table.
3. She doesn't demand a plate to go.
4. She’s perfectly willing to accept the crumbs that fall from the table for the dogs to eat.

So often, I’ve thought that God’s blessing must be equivalent to my expectations; my expectation would always dictate my perception of the proportional size of God's blessings.

I didn’t want just a slice of cake, I wanted the whole cake!

What I see in this woman’s example is that the size of the blessing is irrelevant, because even a crumb from Jesus was enough to heal her daughter. She didn’t need Jesus to give a sixty minute sermon on how he would heal her daughter. She didn’t need to live in the lap of luxury to experience the healing of her daughter.

She understood that even the tiniest granule of blessing from Jesus was sufficient enough to accomplish all she needed.

She was at her edge of darkness, yet she knew dawn was coming.

She knew this because she was unwilling to give up loving Jesus, in exchange for living a life of disappointment and frustration. I heard a preacher once say that when you get a slice of cake, it contains the same ingredients as the whole cake. That cake has eggs, flour, sugar, flavor and everything put in the batter; so does a slice of that same cake.

My ticket has all that too!

Although it may seem like God is only saying, “Take a number”, perhaps I’ve been rejecting my ticket that reserves a slice of cake for me. As a result, I was demonstrating my lack of love for God by refusing to accept my ticket; believing instead that I would never get a slice. I believed that ticket held no value for me.

But that’s not the case anymore!

I’ll love God in my darkest hour just as much as I love myself. I’m making choices to please Him, not that I may curry His favor, but because I want to love Him. I’m not giving up on God.

What I’ve come to realize is that God hasn’t given up on me. Whether it’s a slice of cake or just a crumb, I believe God will provide it. Even if He says, “Take a number”, that’s good enough for me because that ticket has all the ingredients I need for an answer to my prayer.

Note: This post is linked to Spiritual Sundays (hosted by Charlotte and Ginger).

Footnotes:

1. Matthew 22:34-40, NASB
2. Mark 7:24-30, NASB

References:

1. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6
2. The NIV Study Bible, Edited by Kenneth Barker, Donald Burdick, John Stek, Walter Wessel and Ronald Youngblood, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530, USA

Hemmed In

“Then the LORD said to Moses, 'Tell the Israelites to turn back and encamp near Pi Hahiroth, between Migdol and the sea. They are to encamp by the sea, directly opposite Baal Zephon. Pharaoh will think,’ ‘The Israelites are wandering around the land in confusion, hemmed in by the desert.’ "¹

At some point, everyone who calls on the name of Jesus Christ will find their faith challenged. Some may argue with this statement by asserting, “My faith in Christ has never wavered!”

Faith that wavers and faith that is challenged are not one in the same.

Often when my faith was challenged, I have felt as if I were hemmed in; as though I had no way out. I believe that the enemy of my faith wants me to regret my decision to trust God with the outcome; to somehow believe I can turn around and go back.

The Israelites experienced this challenge in Pi Hahiroth:

“As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up, and there were the Egyptians, marching after them. They were terrified and cried out to the LORD.”²

Fear always accompanies a challenge to your faith. You feel trapped, realizing there is no way of escape. You can’t go back, you can’t go laterally to the left or right, and there in front of you is an obstacle with no visible pathway.

How do you combat fear?

All of us experience fear in some form. All of us deal with fear differently.

A woman waits nervously for her doctor to reveal the news of tests that were run. An athlete anxiously awaits the announcement of his name so that he can race onto the field of competition. A politician tentatively awaits her introduction to a packed audience. A family faces the uncertainty of losing their home unless they can somehow resume making their mortgage payments. A man waits for a job offer after enduring months of unemployment.

Each of these people found themselves in dire straits much like the Israelites were in this passage of scripture; they were hemmed in by their circumstances. God told Moses,

“Tell the Israelites to turn back and encamp before Pi-Hahiroth, between Migdol and the [Red] Sea, before Baal-Zephon. You shall encamp opposite it by the sea.”³

Israel reached a dead end at Etham. It was here that God told Moses to turn back. They then camped between the three geographic points of Pi-Hahiroth, Migdol, and Baal-Zephon (on the opposite side of the Red Sea). Etham was impassable, as was the impassable rocky terrain of Pi Hahiroth. Migdol was a military lookout post that many believe sent word to Pharaoh of the Israelites location. From their present position, the Israelites could see Baal-Zephon, but the Red Sea formed a gulf between the shores where they camped and the mountaintop view of Baal-Zephon. To make matters worse, they were being pursued by the military forces of Pharaoh’s army.

They were hemmed in!

They couldn’t go back to that life they left in Egypt, and it appeared as though they couldn’t escape Pharaoh’s army.

Watching as the Egyptians approached, fear grabbed them by the throat.

In their fear, they cried out to God. They cried out to the One who is The God of My Salvation. I wonder if they prayed, “God save me!”

I’ve faced circumstances where I was hemmed in. Thinking about this passage of scripture, I can easily see myself in the position of Israel. I prayed for the God of miracles to rescue me. I called on the same God who provided a Pillar of Cloud and a Pillar of Fire, to demonstrate His miraculous power and might. Some may say that, “God works no miracles today.” Others may say, “There is no God.” But those who by faith trust in The Eternal God, believe that,

“…without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.”⁴

I believe that God was leading Israel to a land of promise, but to get there, Israel had to go through trials. They face circumstances that pointed to The One True God as their Deliverer. Israel feared Pharaoh and his army. But God wanted them to move from the place of fear to the place of faith. To get them to the place of faith, God had to deliver Israel and demolish Pharaoh’s army.

To get you to the place of faith, God must deliver you and demolish what you fear.

While your circumstance may have you hemmed in, the place of faith lies ahead of you; to get there, you must move forward.

It doesn’t matter how God opens up your path, all that matters is that you trust Him with each step you take. Sometimes we may go through a Red Sea experience where the doctors have done all they can do, and the sickness has us hemmed in. We don’t know if we will escape, but God says,

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.”⁵

You may find yourself in the wilderness of the unemployed, hemmed in by the lack of opportunity. The bank may be ready to foreclose on your home but God is still the same. He loves and cares about every one of us.

When I’m hemmed in by fear and circumstance, I’ll remember to,

“Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.”⁶

“Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.”⁷

I may be hemmed in by my circumstance, but I’m not without hope. I’m not going to live in fear and hopelessness. I’ll trust God to deliver me. I’m going to walk right up to the shoreline; I’ll do my part and trust God to make a way.

Sovereign God,

I'm standing on the shores of my very own Red Sea experience; hemmed in by a circumstance, but I'm not afraid. You are the same, yesterday, today and forever; Jesus Christ, Lord of all. Though the enemy of my faith rages, I will not be afraid. You order both night and day, the dawn arises by Your word. You are The God of Miracles. You proved Yourself in the wilderness to Israel. You delivered them from Pharaoh and his army. You completely vanquished the enemy of Israel just as it is written, "The Egyptians you see today you will never see again." My life is in Your hands Lord; I put my faith and trust in You. I wait on You Lord. Open up the windows of heaven and pour Your blessings upon us. You give us more grace that we may resist the enemy. Thank You Lord for delivering us from our circumstance. We thank and praise You, we give You the glory You richly deserve. Amen.

Note: Several months ago, a blogger friend suggested I visit Charlotte and Ginger who host the blog Spiritual Sundays, and that I should link in with fellow bloggers who share encouraging and inspirational posts.

I believe you will find hearts ablaze with faith, love, compassion, kindness, humility, and fellowship in Christ. I encourage you to visit. You won't be disappointed.

Footnotes:

1. Exodus 14:1-3, NIV
2. Exodus 14:10, NIV
3. Exodus 14:2, Amplified Bible
4. Hebrews 11:6, NASB
5. Proverbs 3:5-6, NASB
6. Psalm 27:14, KJV
7. Isaiah 40:31, NASB

References:

1. King James Version, The Crusade Analytical Study Edition, Crusade Bible Publishers, Inc., PO Box 90011, Nashville, Tennessee 37209
2. The NIV Study Bible, Edited by Kenneth Barker, Donald Burdick, John Stek, Walter Wessel and Ronald Youngblood, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530, USA
3. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6
4. Matthew Henry's Commentary, McDonald Publishing Company, McLean, Virginia 22101, ISBN 0-917006-21-6
5. Amplified Bible, BibleGateway.com

The Mind of a Conqueror

I’ve been thinking about Joshua and Caleb this week. Specifically, I’ve been reminded by the Holy Spirit that although an obstacle may loom larger than life, an obstacle does not tower over God. Joshua and Caleb had the mind of a conqueror because they both believed nothing was greater than God. Moses sent twelve men to the land of promise, each was assigned to analyze, assess, and evaluate the level of effort needed to take possession of land promised to the nation of Israel by God. Twelve of those men came back and reported that the land offered the things to which God had spoken of, a land that:

“…certainly does flow with milk and honey”¹

But ten of those men also said:

“…the people who live in the land are strong, and the cities are fortified and very large; and moreover, we saw the descendants of Anak there. Amalek is living in the land of the Negev and the Hittites and the Jebusites and the Amorites are living in the hill country, and the Canaanites are living by the sea and by the side of the Jordan.”²

This is an example of how obstacles appear larger that they really are. Our eyes will cause us to exaggerate and believe things we see, even when the truth echoes before us. Caleb (one of the twelve) responded by saying,

“We should by all means go up and take possession of it, for we will surely overcome it.”³

Why after all the things God had done for these people did ten of these men reach a place of doubt, worry, anxiety and fear?

I think that these ten men looked not to God, but measured themselves against the people who inhabited the Promised Land. In Egypt, these men were slaves. They had a slave mentality. Even though God delivered them from their Egyptian oppressors, parted the Red Sea, fed them bread from heaven, provided them with meat and water, led them with pillar of a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night, they still considered themselves as slaves. It’s the reason I believe they kept making references to how good they had it in Egypt; making bricks!

I believe that we embrace our past because we fear the future; even if that past was the worst possible experience we’ve ever had. Why does a person stay in a dead-end job? What keeps a co-dependent dependent? What makes a person see the worst possible thing in their life as something to hold on to? Why does a person find it so easy to say, “I’m a failure” rather than saying, “I’ll face this challenge by trusting God for my success”?

How often do the words, “I can’t”, “I’ll never”, “It’s hopeless”, and “What’s the use” come from your mouth?

Have you ever found yourself singing or (those who don’t sing) humming a tune in your head that somehow doesn’t want to go away? Sometimes, it’s just a catchy phrase such as, “You’ve got mail”, “Not going anywhere”, “What’s in your wallet?” or “Bags fly free”. We hear it and then subconsciously it begins to loop in our mind, constantly repeating; again and again.

The same thing appears to happen when I repeat messages that somehow reinforce that I’m incapable of achieving anything. Instead of saying these words repeatedly, I must choose to say something that gives me faith, joy, contentment and hope. I’m not talking about a commercial where I claim to have the knowledge of a skilled surgeon just because I slept in a certain hotel. No, just saying, “I’m a surgeon” one hundred times, doesn’t make me one. But why are the words, “I'll never...”, so believable to me? What if I began to remind myself of who I am, who I belong to, and who is on my side?

I am a follower of Christ. I confess my faith and trust in Him daily, and yet, something happens when I’m faced with A Problem. I transform it into My Problem, volunteering myself for this duty. I do this even though the words, “the battle is the Lord’s”⁴ are in my spirit, I act as if I’m all alone. Worry, doubt, anxiety and fear are all consuming. Like a wildfire, worry, doubt, anxiety and fear consume me until I’m a living example of worry, doubt, anxiety and fear. I sacrificially offer myself in an effort to appease it, but after being consumed, all that’s left is a discouraged shell of someone who feels helpless and hopeless.

I realize now why the scripture says,

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert.”⁵

I believe this means to throw worry, doubt, anxiety and fear off myself and direct them toward God. What’s the first thing you do when you enter your home? You remove a coat, jacket or sweater; tossing it to a familiar place. Perhaps it’s those shoes you’ve worn all day. Maybe it’s a hat or scarf you remove. You’ve done it so many times, that it becomes a subconscious act. Whatever it is, you don’t continue to wear it because you recognize it’s unnecessary; you’re home, a place of comfort and security. I believe God wants me to have that attitude about Him; He’s my shelter, my spiritual home of comfort and security. It is here that I must remove (cast off) all my cares (worry, doubt, anxiety and fear), and direct them to God.

Why? God cares about me, totally and completely.

So only two of the twelve men (Joshua and Caleb) recognized that the physical appearance of those who lived in the Promised Land didn’t mean defeat, they dared to say,

“…and they spoke to all the congregation of the sons of Israel, saying, 'The land which we passed through to spy out is an exceedingly good land. If the LORD is pleased with us, then He will bring us into this land and give it to us--a land which flows with milk and honey. Only do not rebel against the LORD; and do not fear the people of the land, for they will be our prey. Their protection has been removed from them, and the LORD is with us; do not fear them.' ”⁶

They understood that the LORD was with them. The LORD would empower them to achieve victory. They understood that when you look at an obstacle with the natural eye, defeat appears imminent, but when I look through the eyes of Christ, that obstacle becomes a stepping stone to victory. Stop carrying around your cares (worry, doubt, anxiety and fear); have the mind of a conqueror, a spiritual conqueror.

Cast them, throw them off; give them to the LORD.

Remember, your obstacle has no protection from God.

Remind yourself that, the LORD is with you.

Do not be afraid of what opposition you face.

Do you want to be a spiritual conqueror?

Stop saying what you can’t do and begin reminding yourself what God can do!

Believe and trust God…Be all you can be in Christ…be a conqueror!

“...’we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”⁷

Dear LORD,

You give us Your grace in abundance. In all things we are more than conquerors through Christ. I am confident in You. I acknowledge that the obstacles I face have no protection from You, You are with me, I will not fear what is before me. The realization that You are God and there is none like You gives me both joy and peace. Bless our faith so that we may bless and encourage others, pointing them to You. We can do nothing without You LORD. I bless and exalt Your Name, which is above every name. I thank You for the joy and peace the Holy Spirit gives me. It is written that, "And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed." Your grace abounds in us O LORD. Thank You. Amen.

Footnotes:

1. Numbers 13:27, NIV
2. Numbers 13:28-29, NIV
3. Numbers 13:30, NIV
4. 1 Samuel 17:47,NASB
5. 1 Peter 5:7-8, NIV
6. Numbers 14:7-9, NIV
7. Romans 8:36-39, NIV

References:

1. The NIV Study Bible, Edited by Kenneth Barker, Donald Burdick, John Stek, Walter Wessel and Ronald Youngblood, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530, USA
2. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6
3. Biblegateway.com

The Struggle

“My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? Far from my deliverance are the words of my groaning. O my God, I cry by day, but Thou dost not answer; And by night, but I have no rest. Yet Thou art holy…”1

This Psalm written by king David speaks to God about David’s personal struggle in two areas:

1. His sense of rejection by God
2. His obvious rejection by others

The first time I read this (and every time since then), I’ve thought of Jesus Christ hanging on the cross for my sins and those of every other human being; I viewed it as a prophetic utterance by David. This morning however, I’m looking back and hearing the singular voice of David, a man in spiritual and emotional crisis.

I read this recent expression from a fellow blogger:

“I've been struggling with my Christianity BIG TIME. I know some of you are scoffing at that statement and are saying with a sarcastic tone ‘Oh well who isn't struggling in their faith.’ Well, guys I need you to be a little sympathetic here. Anyway, as I was saying, it's been so, so, so hard with everything. Earlier, I was trying to express to my friend ____ how I was feeling but I couldn't quite find the words to say.”

I read this and thought back to what seemed for me an eternity ago but in truth it has only been five months since I expressed similar thoughts. After years of ignoring God, I finally decided that my life and the decisions I’d made resulted in complete and abject failure. I decided to seek the Lord in January, beginning with daily prayer, bible study and meditation. At this time, I was not attending a church; I was attempting to connect with God in my own comfortable way.

The skills I developed in my professional career were what I depended on to analyze, identify, strategize and implement a plan that would successfully resurrect me from my personal abyss. For me, this is the methodology I always used for problem solving and resolution; it’s what I knew, I was comfortable with this approach because it worked for me.

What I didn’t know was this methodology didn’t work for God.

God was going to resurrect my life but it would have to be done His way, using a schedule and method I was unfamiliar with. I was too dependent on me, instead of God. In order to experience a real resurrection in my life, it would mean I’d have to forsake me.

Through the first four months of 2010, I experienced a peace in spite of the outward chaos around me, but not once did I feel or sense that I was really connected to God. I was following my methodology but God remained silent to me. By April, I began to ask myself,

What’s the matter? Why is God silent? Why am I being ignored when I genuinely want to hear from Him?

These series of questions became a part of my daily prayer, but still, there was no reply from God.

I remember being home alone and as I prayed, something happened, I began to confess to God that I didn’t know what to do, there was no one else for me to turn to, I had no place to go; there was only God and me. I began crying from a sense of utter helplessness and part of me tried to hold back those tears because, I’m a man and where I come from, men don’t cry.

I found myself struggling then; with myself. I don’t have a clear understanding of what I was saying or doing; there is a part of me fighting to get composed and there is another part of me pressing to escape. I remember saying,

“If God is done with me, if what I’m doing is pointless and miserably hopeless, then I’ll be miserable but I’m not going back to where I was. I’m not giving up!”

This was my moment of breakthrough, my moment of forsaking me. It was the moment that the Holy Spirit helped me to see that my life wasn’t about me, my life is about God. I believe that even though I didn’t understand it, I experienced a worship of the Lord. It is the reason that despite David feeling all alone and struggling with a sense of rejection he could say,

“Yet Thou art holy…”²

Despite what he felt, David acknowledged that even in the midst of his unenviable circumstances, God is holy, just and right in every way!

I finally arrived at the place of worship and like David; I recognized the righteousness and holiness of God. It no longer mattered to me what I thought or felt about my own personal circumstances; the only thing that matters is my recognition and acknowledgement of God. The supremacy of Almighty God is all that matters to me.

Even if it meant that there was no God at all, a premise I was unwilling to accept; I would believe the truth about God rather than what others might consider a lie.

Paul wrote to the church in Corinth:

“…if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised; and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless; you are still in your sins…If we have hoped in Christ in this life only, we are of all men most to be pitied.”³

If salvation is nothing more than a fairy tale, then I am nothing more than a child who mails letters to the North Pole, hoping to get a response from Santa Claus. Those around me with intelligence (believe they) know the truth, but they indulge me because they understand, "I can’t help the way I am"; I am a man to be pitied.

There is a passage in Daniel which the Holy Spirit keeps affirming in my spirit. Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego were threatened with death by king Nebuchadnezzar. They were given the choice of two options:

1. Submit to idolatry
2. Suffer painful death

What I’ve come to realize is that God doesn’t have to prove anything to me or anyone else. If God does something to demonstrate His existence, love, kindness or grace; it is because God is sovereign and He simply chooses to.

Faced with a fiery painful death, these three young men recognized that God could save them, if that’s what He wanted to do, but they decided that even if God chose not to save them, they wouldn’t give up on God and submit to idolatry.

God wasn’t obligated to answer me when I felt so alone. He didn’t have to prove Himself to me in order to be assured that He exists. He’s God all by Himself. God has already done everything necessary for me to live for Him. When Jesus hung on the cross and said,

“It is finished!”⁴

Everything God needed to do on my behalf was accomplished to save me. This is what provision from God accomplishes for me. Whatever I need is there for me, in Christ Jesus. Whether I accept the grace and provisions of God is my choice but God finished what I needed Him to do.

It was me then who changed from demanding assurances to declaring dependence. I could be bombarded with thoughts of abandonment by God, and the futility of faith; but those thoughts became irrelevant and insignificant to me. I determined that even if I never got an inkling from God, I believe in Him.

Many have faced the struggle of trusting God, hearing a voice in their head that quizzes:

If Jesus is truly the Son of God, then why…?

You may be in a place of desolation, a desert and you’re spiritually, emotionally and physically weary, helpless and feeling so alone; God says, “I AM”

You may be helpless but you’re not alone. God is with you, and in your desperation, something deep inside you wants to proclaim with a sense of urgency,

Don’t give up on God! Declare who God is, affirm your faith; worship Him.


You may find yourself unsteady as you speak, but don’t stop; keep worshipping the Lord, confessing your unyielding faith and trust in Him alone.

Your struggle to trust God will free you.

Father God,

I struggle within myself to affirm that You are holy, just and true. I have doubts but I see that I'm looking inward instead of to the author and finisher of my faith. Jesus Christ completes me in every facet of my life. I see my purpose now. My purpose is to worship and honor You with my life. I trust You Lord. Though I can't see, I believe and see through the eyes of faith. I've never known real victory until now. "I have victory!" Not because of who I am but because of who You are. Even if all around me is sinking sand, I will trust in the Lord. Thank You Lord Jesus for giving me faith that is uncompromising, resolute and determined. Amen.

Footnotes:

1. Psalm 22:1-3, NASB
2. Psalm 22:3, NASB
3. 1 Corinthians 15:16-17; 19, NASB
4. John 19:30, NASB

References:

1. Strong's Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, By James B. Strong, S.T.D, LL.D., Riverside Book and Bible House, Iowa Falls, Iowa 50126
2. Unger's Bible Dictionary, By Merrill F. Unger, Moody Press, Chicago
3. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6

Trust

Trust is easy when there's confidence

During my morning meditation, the Holy Spirit reminded me of a word that I’ve used quite a bit lately; it’s the word trust.

I recall it coming up after my surgery when I began physical therapy in May. Unknown to my therapist, I discussed how uncomfortable wearing my arm sling was with my surgeon and he conceded that while at home, there was no need to wear it. He gave me this permission with the understanding that if I went out, I would wear the sling. The problem was that I got adjusted to not wearing a sling around the house, so on my first therapy appointment I rolled up without my arm in a sling.

As my therapist walked into the room she immediately began with an interrogation; the only missing prop for this scene was an intense light shining in my face. Instead of the normal hello followed by the introduction protocols, she alarmingly asked.

“Where’s your sling?”

I didn’t pick up on the seriousness of her tone and my, it’s no big deal reply answered,

“Oh my bad, you know what; I forgot to put it on before I left the house.”

“You’re supposed to be in that sling all the time!”

“I know, I know, but I forgot it this morning. I haven’t been wearing it at home and I simply left this morning without putting it on.”

“Does Dr._____________ know you don't wear the sling?”

“I wear the sling; I just forgot to put it on this morning.”

“Yes, but does he know you don’t wear it at all?”

“OK, I didn’t say, ‘I don’t ever wear it.’ What I said was, ‘I don’t wear it around the house.’ And I did discuss it with my doctor and he agreed that I didn’t have to wear it at home.”

“Well, I’ll have to talk with the doctor to see if he really did say that.”

At this point, I’m a little puzzled.

“You say that like I’m not telling you the truth.”

To which she replied,

“You’d be surprised at the lies I’ve been told by patients.”

“Look, I realize you don’t know me but I have no reason to lie to you. I mean really, what would be the point? What can you do to me? I have nothing to gain by lying to you. If that were the case, why would I even come here today if the intent wasn’t to facilitate recovery from the surgery? I’m here to get better. The fact that I’m sitting here with you implies not only that I want to get better but that I’m extending trust to you to help me. But that works both ways. You have to extend trust to me as well.”

She looked at me and replied,

“You’ll have to earn my trust.”

I looked into her bluish-grey eyes, smiled and said,

“Trust isn’t something earned. It’s a choice one makes. You give it or you don’t. You may want assurances but ultimately, you extend trust despite any reservations you may have or you simply don’t trust me.”

She stood there quietly for a moment looking at me and then responded,

“I guess that’s true but I’ll have to think about that.”

It was in that moment that I myself realized that trust is not something measured out in increments; it is given in full measure or it isn’t given at all. I could see that God through Jesus Christ extended trust to me but He went beyond extending trust by demonstrating His trustworthiness. He did this without requiring me to earn His trust.

How foolish I’d been for most of my life, parceling out itty, bitty bits of trust as a reward to those who satisfied me. I wasn’t really extending trust; I was doing what was necessary to get what I wanted.

The object of trust isn’t getting something in return; it’s giving of one’s self to another. This is what God does.

There are several Hebrew words used in scripture for trust, three which I will focus on are chacah, yachal and mibtach. Chacah (khaw-saw’) means to flee (to) for protection; [figuratively] to confide in:--have hope, make refuge, (put) trust. This word reminds me of times when I’ve sought the shelter of a doorway from a hard driving rain; trusting it to keep me from being drenched by the downpour. Scriptures which speak of chacah include:

“And the bramble said to the trees, ‘If in truth you are anointing me as king over you, come and take refuge [trust] in my shade; but if not, may fire come out from the bramble and consume the cedars of Lebanon.’”¹

“My God, my rock, in whom I [trust] take refuge; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold and my refuge [trust].”²

Yachal (yaw-chal’) means to wait; by implication it means to be patient, hope :--( cause to, have, or make to) hope, be pained, stay, tarry, trust, or wait. This reminds me of those times I’ve stood in a long line waiting for an audience to speak with someone, or standing in line at a counter while those before me completed their transactions. Scriptures which speak of yachal include:

“Though he slay me, I will hope [trust] in Him.”³

“And for My arm they will wait [trust] expectantly.”⁴

Mibtach (mib-tawkh’) means a refuge, i.e. security, or (subjectively speaking) assurance:--confidence, hope, sure or trust. This reminds me of the attitude I had when I competed in sports and the confidence within me that victory was mine. Scriptures which speak of mibtach include:

“How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust…”⁵

“For Thou art my hope; O Lord God, Thou art my confidence [trust] from my youth.”⁶

The Greek word most often used in the New Testament for trust is the word elpizo (el-pid’-zo) which means, to expect or confide:--(have, thing) hope (-d) (for), trust. Scriptures which reference elpizo include:

“indeed, we had the sentence of death within ourselves in order that we should not trust in ourselves; but in God who raises the dead;”⁷

“who delivered us from so great a peril of death, and will deliver us, He on whom we have set our hope [trust]. And He will yet deliver us,”⁸

“For it is for this we labor and strive, because we have fixed our hope [trust] on the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of believers.”⁹

So as I meditate on the biblical concept of trust, I realize that it incorporates my willingness to confide in God the things which are of concern to me, my desire to seek refuge in Him and to live my life in a way that reinforces the hope I’ve placed in Christ.

I have been let down by friends, by family members, I have encountered people who are not trustworthy, and I have betrayed the trust which others placed in me; a betrayal which causes disappointment. But I have no accusation against God for a betrayal of the trust I’ve given Him. I’ve discovered that even when I didn’t trust God, He proved Himself trustworthy.

God upholds His word so He never has a problem demonstrating He is trustworthy.

My word has failed me and others so often that I must acknowledge that I’m not trustworthy.

I can’t rely on myself to be trustworthy; I must rely on the trustworthiness of God.

If I am to allow Christ to live in me, then I must yield this part of me to Christ and allow His attribute of trust to operate in my life.

How do I allow this to happen?

As I mentioned earlier, the Hebrew word yachal means to wait, or to be patient. The apostle Paul refers to this in his letter to the church in Galatia:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is…patience…”¹⁰

Patience teaches me to trust God in every area of my life.

In learning to be patient, I find that God gives me opportunities to exercise my patient muscles. I know there are no physical muscles for patience but there are spiritual muscles that I can exercise that develop patience in me.

So the next time I’m standing in line and the cashier calls for a price check, or the customer in front of me has fifteen items in the line which says, 10 items or less, rather than allow the situation to blossom into a frustrating experience, I will remind myself that God is giving me an opportunity to demonstrate patience. In doing so, I will be confiding to Him that, I trust You Lord; not me.

Father God,

Thank You that You prove Yourself trustworthy to me. You are teaching me to seek refuge in You, to confide in You, to wait on You, to trust in You. You've equipped me with the fruit of the Spirit, and so I have patience resident within me. I will no longer rely and trust in me; my trust is in You Lord. You are giving me learning opportunities that patience may have it's perfect work in me. Thank You for enabling me to grow in Your grace, truth and trust. Amen.

Footnotes:

1. Judges 9:15, NASB
2. 2 Samuel 22:3, NASB
3. Job 13:15, NASB
4. Isaiah 51:5, NASB
5. Psalm 40:4, NASB
6. Psalm 71:5, NASB
7. 2 Corinthians 1:9, NASB
8. 2 Corinthians 1:10, NASB
9. 1 Timothy 4:10, NASB
10. Galatians 5:22, NASB

References:

1. Strong's Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, By James B. Strong, S.T.D, LL.D., Riverside Book and Bible House, Iowa Falls, Iowa 50126
2. The Ryrie Study Bible (New American Standard Version), Edited by Charles C. Ryrie, Moody Publishers, Chicago, Illinois, ISBN 0-8024-8920-6